Tuesday, May 31, 2011


I have decided to pre record responses for if I ever do get to meet my heroes. I don't generally know how to talk like a human, so I think if the actual thing happened there would be less words and more uncontrolled fits of crying. Sometimes the crying happens alone, without the actual thing. These are the first words that pop into my head before the tears start.
They are uncensored, one take just like the real deal. They are not really meant to be anything, but I know at one point I will rewatch these and I will cringe and I will hate myself.
Also I guess that sometimes I get scared about the tiny planet we are on, the thought that the people these are destined for are never likely to see them is something nice to rest my head on.
HI MIRANDA JULY. This stalker vid is for you.

You will meet one someday.

I bet you don't believe in magic cats. But they exist. They only come out of the woodwork when the night is temperate, and you have nothing left to prove. There is a thirteen story building just down the street and you are fairly certain that no one would notice you climb that building.

It is around this point in time that you will see a magic cat. She will always be a she. She will be grey and she will look like a cat you have known in your past. She will mew and she will hold on to you like no one else has ever done.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Now I would like to talk to you.

I am not sure why, but I am going to start talking to you on the internet.

Into the abyss.

Miranda July asked if she could see our long term inanimate best friends as they crawl after us when we trip up, or, as I tend to do instead, fall in a heap.
For someone I have never met, I quite like her so I did just this.

This is Big Ted. He was waiting for me on the table next to my mother as she birthed me. He knows all my secrets and would follow me into the dark.